Believe it or not, I am a senior in college and have not had a boyfriend or been on a date in the 3 years I have been here. Shocking, right? But maybe this has almost been one of my secret weapons that has propelled me to success.
Being a single, independent woman in college is a good thing.
Why?
1. You get to find yourself- If you are constantly hand-in-hand with your boyfriend, you will never be able to experience life on your own and develop YOU. It is important, especially during an interview or anytime you are in front of anyone communicating your "Personal Brand", to know who you are and be confident. If you have spent your entire college life tagged to that soccer player or high school boyfriend you are too afraid to leave, chances are you can't remember the last time you did something because YOU wanted to. You don't know who YOU are.
Boyfriends make you lose touch with yourself.
"The One" will want you to be YOU, and you won't feel lost at all. Remember that.
2. It makes you realize who your "Dream Guy" is: Because you don't have a boyfriend, you can ultimately have a very long "test run" with all those frat boys or group partners. NO I DO NOT MEAN "MESSING AROUND".
I mean you get to build friendships with all kinds of guys and learn who works for you and who doesn't. College is the best time to do that since people come from everywhere and all different backgrounds.
You get to say to yourself, "You know, Matt is a great friend, but there are certain X qualities about him that I just couldn't see myself wanting in "The One".
I have multiple guys I would openly say I am in love with, but I can say FOR ALL OF THEM, I know they aren't "The One". Further accentuating my point.
Finding the one takes a LONG time! And getting to know who a guy truly is takes a LONG time.
3. No Pressure- Especially for you girls in a long distance relationship (hello Freshman girls, you will meet so many other guys in college, give those high school crushes up!) you are constantly trying to "keep the relationship healthy". Let me guess:
- You have your designated calling time each night, which he gets upset if you cancel or miss.
- You have to text him all the time.
- He complains that you seem like you are "Too busy for a relationship".
Well newsflash girls: You ARE too busy! You are starting the four most important years of building your personal brand and your future.
If your relationship feels like another homework assignment, its time to re-evaluate the situation.
So, here are 5 things I want you to take away:
1. Being Single = You have time to take care of YOU. The most important person.
2. Who said you have to be married at 23?- You set your own life goals. If you want that dream office with the great corporate car, YOU GO FOR IT. BOYS CAN WAIT.
3. You are perfect- Don't think that you don't have a boyfriend because "something is wrong with you". Most of the time, boys are probably intimidated by how driven, independent, and confident you are. Those kind of girls are a minority now, and boys just don't know how to handle them.
4. Have crushes. Lots of them -Love them. Be friends with them. Its like a pretend boyfriend. I love mine. They are great! And most of the time having them around, I never even feel that "I need a boyfriend". Like I said before, I know they aren't THE ONE, but they therefore teach me so much about what components my "Dream Guy" needs.
5. Most importantly remember...
"Even miracles take a little time"- Fairy Godmother
Best Wishes,
Meredith
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